I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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