Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize