Is it normal to miss your booty call?
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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