Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
high people should be assigned attendants
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Randomize
