how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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