I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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