Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
