Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Randomize
