no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Randomize