Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
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His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
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Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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