All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
