At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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