Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Randomize
