There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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