got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
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