he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
he told me I talked like a deaf person
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
