we have officially mastered the walk of shame
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
