he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
