k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
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