I can't watch pbs sober anymore
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize