just tell him i said nine months
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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