Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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