a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
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