can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
