did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
