school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
