Can Purell be used as lube?
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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