JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
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