Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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