how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
