What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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