You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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