It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
i need some magic done to my vagina
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
