the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
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