the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
