It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
My apartment stinks of burning failure
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
