is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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