K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
