wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
