And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Randomize
