HIV tests are more positive than that guy
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Randomize