white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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