Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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