So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
He's on the porch naked. Help.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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