maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
that's an acceptable place to lick
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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