so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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