I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize