Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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