she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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