don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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