I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
