I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
