Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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