he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
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